- By P.M. Forni

Choosing Civility: The Twenty-Five Rules of Considerate Conduct

  • Title: Choosing Civility: The Twenty-Five Rules of Considerate Conduct
  • Author: P.M. Forni
  • ISBN: 9780312302504
  • Page: 313
  • Format: Paperback
  • Choosing Civility The Twenty Five Rules of Considerate Conduct Most people would agree that thoughtful behavior and common decency are in short supply or simply forgotten in hurried lives of emails cellphones and multi tasking In Choosing Civility P M Forni i

    Most people would agree that thoughtful behavior and common decency are in short supply, or simply forgotten in hurried lives of emails, cellphones, and multi tasking In Choosing Civility, P M Forni identifies the twenty five rules that are most essential in connecting effectively and happily with others In clear, witty, and, well.lized language, Forni covers topMost people would agree that thoughtful behavior and common decency are in short supply, or simply forgotten in hurried lives of emails, cellphones, and multi tasking In Choosing Civility, P M Forni identifies the twenty five rules that are most essential in connecting effectively and happily with others In clear, witty, and, well.lized language, Forni covers topics that include Think Twice Before Asking Favors Give Constructive Criticism Refrain from Idle Complaints Respect Others Opinions Don t Shift Responsibility and Blame Care for Your Guests Accept and Give PraiseFinally, Forni provides examples of how to put each rule into practice and so make life and the lives of others enjoyable, companionable, and rewarding.Choosing Civility is a simple, practical, perfectly measured, and quietly magical handbook on the lost art of civility and compassion.

    1 thought on “Choosing Civility: The Twenty-Five Rules of Considerate Conduct

    1. Wish it had a rip out list in the front or back as a "cheat sheet" of the 25 rules. So, here they are:1. Pay Attention2. Acknowledge Others3. Think the Best4. Listen5. Be Inclusive6. Speak Kindly7. Don't Speak Ill8. Accept and Give Praise9. Respect Even a Subtle "No"10.Respect Others' Opinions11.Mind Your Body12.Be Agreeable13.Keep it Down14.Respect Other People's Time15.Respect Other People's Space16.Apologize Earnestly17.Assert Yourself18.Avoid Personal Questions19.Care for Your Guests20.Be a [...]

    2. Forni defines civility as the art of cultivating respectful relationships with the purpose of being good community members and good neighbors. This is a charming and kindhearted book about why life is better when we are thoughtful and respectful with each other. Forni treats kindness and consideration in relationships as art forms that can be learned, taught, and honed; he digs through the ritual of etiquette to find their philosophic foundations. His "25 Rules" include advice like: pay attentio [...]

    3. This book had some good advice. The begginning is very slow. So much so that I found myself falling asleep but its mostly just the first part of the book. Part One of the book mostly argues why civility is important and that being polite isn't hypocritical. Part Two gives all the dos and don'ts to do with house guests, strangers, coworkers, etc. This is where the 25 rules of conduct are.Part Three just sums up everything. Like I mentioned before it has good advice so it was useful but just a bit [...]

    4. This is for a college class and it was really good. I have experience reading books like this so it wasn't that hard for me. It was a real eye opener. It's all about being civil but as I read it, I thought about situations where I could have applied the rule and I feel like a new person and can actually see the world. This book was for my University 1000 class that doesn't start for another week. XD

    5. How does one critique a book on civility with civility? This book was just a bit too basic. The advice was good, but the book is slow-paced and the points could have been addressed in far fewer pages and it wasn't a very thick book to begin with. Felt like someone wrote it just to have the credit of having written a book. I would say there must be a better book on the subject out there. if you know what it is, feel free to recommend.

    6. Video review: youtu/gyjCZvmLhsw?t=1m9sA great self-help and grounding book that reminds us how to act as adults and citizens in every area of our lives.

    7. First, I think this book needs a new title. I like the subtitle "The twenty-five rules of considerate conduct" because that spoke to why I picked up this book: I wanted to be a more considerate person. "Choosing Civility" makes it sound like we've all been uncivil until now, and I found it to be a little holier-than-thou.Second, this book needs an editor. The first 30 pages argue the case for civility, which is unnecessary because you've already gotten the reader to pick up the book. The last 30 [...]

    8. This was a lovely little book about why we should choose civility in our everyday lives and what that looks like. It was a good reminder of why we are polite with each other ("Rudeness is the weak man's imitation of strength." Eric Hoffer) and helped me realize where I might improve in my behavior towards others. Highly recommended.For the library types out there: I learned about this in Public Libraries, July/August 2011: "Choose Civility: Public Libraries Take Center Stage".

    9. Forni is European and it shows. He comes from a culture where respect for people is assumed. America disappoints him now and then. He wants to help America.I need to practice these twenty-five things. If I practiced just these twenty-five things, I would be a much better person. So what are they? Let me list them to remind myself:1. Pay attention2. Acknowledge others3. Think the best4. Listen5. Be inclusive6. Speak kindly7. Don’t speak ill8. Accept and give praise9. Respect even a subtle “no [...]

    10. I recently attended a PLA webinar hosted by Howard County (Md.) Library System (HCLS) CEO Valerie J. Gross. She and her co-presenters discussed the change in culture that her library helped initiate within their community around the topic of civility. Small changes add up and create a kinder, healthier community that has the tools they need to discuss issues in an open environment. A key tool to how Gross got started with the Choose Civility movement, which now involves over 100 partnering local [...]

    11. The difficulty with a book like Choosing Civility is that only polite people will look at it and it preaches to the choir. It's a useful primer on manners, but there's nothing in here your mother didn't try to teach you.I've actually attended a talk by Professor Forni and he is, as you would expect, very well mannered and gently polite. His talk was fascinating and his explanations for the decrease of civility were well researched and thought provokingThis was at a bookstore in Baltimore, Maryla [...]

    12. This book made its way onto my bookshelf because my spouse has to read it for a course he is taking. Like a few other commentators I found the first part of this book difficult to get through (even though it's not long). It nearly derailed my intentions to read the whole thing. The second part which lists the 25 rules of considerate conduct were well done. Some of this is common sense, however, P.M.Forni was spot on with each on. He provided examples of uncivil behaviours or conversations we've [...]

    13. This was a very easy read with useful information. Originally I bought this book because it was required for one of my University classes that all students had to take. Needless to say I thought it would be a boring book that I'd hate and never read again. This book completely surprised me! I found ways that explained how I could better myself as a person conduct-wise; I believe it helped me make college and moving as enjoyable as it's been. It's a book I think everyone could benefit from readin [...]

    14. I love this book & I live by it. It's powerful, it changed me. It made me want to be a better person. Kinder, more courteous & civil to to others. It speaks to its readers intelligently & provides precise & clear directions for a happier & fulfilling life. Best of all, It has less than 200 pages. A must read for everyone.

    15. Consoled me on some pages, indicted me on others - but in a good way; some terrific redirects. Also punctuated with some fantastic quotes throughout. I gave this book to numerous friends and family as a gift since I thought it was such an excellent read; interestingly, the gift seemed to offend some reading. Hopefully not after.

    16. Lots of wonderful common sense information, that isn't really common for today's populace. In observing the lack of civility in America today, Forni outlines how to be a civil member of society. Perhaps this brief volume should be added to required reading lists so that future generations aren't the boars that their parents have become.

    17. Good, practical ideas for being a kinder human being. I plan to introduce this at work, as libraries have always been engaged in civil discourse and interaction. We can model civil behavior - it fits into our mission and speaks to how we engage with people.

    18. The problem with a book like this is that 1) uncivilized people won't read it anyway and 2) civilized people will only fret about the one or two things they'd never considered. It's a good encapsulation of various ways one might act civilly. Have lent this book out already, with success.

    19. so much better than a social etiquette guide. how to respond to uncivilized behavior. more importantly, how to avoid getting sucked into uncivilized behavior by those around you.

    20. For what it sets out to be, this does pretty well. It was not what I thought it was when I chose it. It's a short book with very brief (2-4 pages each) descriptions of Forni's "25 rules of considerate conduct." What once were called manners. But it is far from a simple list of dos and don'ts. Forni opens with several short essays describing the role, function, and reasons for considerate, or what he calls "civil," behavior. The book closes with several short essays grappling however briefly with [...]

    21. 2.5 stars- This book explains how to not behave like a terrible person. If you're not a terrible person you don't need this book. Also most of this book is full of opinions, with a very little amount of facts. The author is quite dull and some of his ideas and stances are very very antiquated. I really did not enjoy this and I definitely would not give it to young people to read b/c civility is changing rapidly as technology advances and society progresses. I had to read this for school and I am [...]

    22. I know many people believe that treating others with kindness and civility is weak, but I think that Professor Forni makes excellent points. One can be assertive and stand up for one's rights without being rude about it. I believe that lack of respect for others and civility towards them is at the heart of so much of our nation's problems today. Good manners cost us nothing and gain us positive feelings that can be nothing but good for us.

    23. This book was a great book, for its word economy as well as its great content. For such a short book, I was amazed by how in-depth the author went, providing insights of his own as well as others'. While some of the rules such as respecting others seemed to be a little straightforward and elementary, others were much more compelling discussions.

    24. Not a perfect book and at times one wants to write a note to Mr. Forni saying, "Have you ever talked to any women in your life? Because your rules for civility is basically how we are all socialized." But, it is a nice and helpful book for those who don't know this is how a person should behave.

    25. This book was dull and understandably preachy. The middle section with the rules of civility was the most relevant to me. I liked that the author didn't bemoan the degradation of civility and manners like many people who care about manners; while acknowledging that certain niceties have essentially disappeared, he also points out that new ones have developed (e.g. respect for minorities).I do feel like I understand better how to make a good impression on others from reading his rules for civilit [...]

    26. Read this as part of my research for a project on civil discourse as it applies to diversity and inclusion. Some good information but dated. The rating is for the value to my inquiry.

    27. Although there were a lot of suggestions that felt somewhat old-fashioned, this books is a reminder our society desperately needs to be kinder and more civil to one another.

    28. It was written in 2002. A need to guide citizens in civil civics was already recognized. This is a good book for anyone who can read at any age.

    29. looking for an alternative to PBIS; this book is the core of the "Choose Civility" Choose 2Bkind programs

    30. A short and sweet book that reminds us to be civil to others. The basic idea is that every bit of consideration for others we show makes the world a better place. I can't find a flaw in that.

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